Oct 24


A new low.

A 21 year old woman gets drunk at her friend's house, goes to the bathroom and feels it is preferable to sit on the floor than stand up.

They phone an ambulance.

We arrive and ask her to stand up.

She informs us that she doesn't want to.

We reply that she can't spend the night on her pal's bathroom floor and we're not spending the evening there either.

She gets up, calls a cab and goes home.

999, having difficult conversations so you don't have to.



17 Responses to “Sit-in”

  1. Freddie says:

    I do sometimes wonder what proportion of jobs could be resolved by sending a stern, matronly, middle-aged woman out to tell people to stop being so bloody stupid…


    Ann Reply:

    The “ISRV” – Idiot Stern Response Vehicle”
    Does anyone else think that an A&E Sister and a door supervisor would make the best crew for it, combining the ability to treat any real problems with the necessary sarcasm, scathing put-downs and brutal honesty, and a bit of muscle just in case.
    Combine these with a digital camera and printer, hole punch and elastic bands to take a photo of the person in their pi$$ed state and attach to their wrist for when they sober up?


    chocks away and all that... Reply:

    or matronly, middle-aged man….


  2. Lynda M O says:

    May I apply for the job of stern and matronly ?~! I hate egregious waste of resources like we see here and everywhere and would relish chances to set right abuses.


  3. Masher says:

    That’s ridiculous! The stupidity of some people never ceases to amaze me.


  4. Win-Stone says:

    The temptation, though, is to begin billing the idiots who make calls like that. It’s an horrendous thought because then people who really DO need an ambulance won’t call ‘just in case’ – but don’t be surprised if when the time comes.

    Alternately, maybe the crews should despatch justice a la Dredd: ‘You rang the ambulance – you are obviously an idiot and your genes are therefore to be removed from the pool.’ Bang. Dead’un.

    Now THAT, in my opinion, has some merit :-)


    Piper Reply:

    The do charge in Holland – they have two ambulance numbers – the 112 (999) one for life threatening emergencies, and another one (which I have forgotten!) for the I can’t get myself to hospital but don’t need blue lights cases – stuff like simple fractures, etc (similar to a GP asking for transport in within a certain time). If you call 112 and don’t need it you get charged. It works because they have the two systems.


  5. Win-Stone says:

    Alternately (2)……………………..

    The police have the ability to charge you with ‘Wasting Police Time': a charge which, I believe (Kal?) is actually taken comparatively seriously by the juduciary. Perhaps it’s time for an addition to the statute along the lines of ‘Wasting an Ambulance’s Time’?


  6. Sewmouse says:

    As you may have noticed, drunk people tend to not be particularly rational thinkers? It occurs to me in this specific instance (and perhaps some few others) that the friends may have tried “everything” their also drink-affected minds could think of and figured someone “official” in a uniform might have better luck?

    And perhaps there was a reason for not wanting police in the house?

    Perhaps a niche market exists for a uniformed service that “first responds” to drunks, and then calls ambulance if there is medical need?


  7. Fee says:

    Medical science can cure many things these days, but alas we still can’t cure stupidity. If she’d sat down in my loo and refused to move, the ready access to cold water for dousing purposes would have got her moving quickly enough.


  8. Amaranthine says:

    Ha ha ha Fee – that would definitely get my vote!


  9. Stargazerchris says:

    I suppose the only advantage of drunks over sober stupid people is you don’t have to be too polite to drunks?


  10. smartwombat says:

    The ISRV is a great idea.
    But as they advertised as “the 4th emergency service” why not contract it out to the AA ?
    Free service to AA members :)


    Ann Reply:

    The AA – would that be the Automobile Association, or Alcoholics Anonymous [:->


  11. Ann says:

    I follow another couple of blogs, and on a similar topic I reckon the nurse in this one had the right idea-


  12. sarah says:

    Haha thanks Ann – love it.
    I agree that wasting any emergency providers time should be charged.
    Keep safe and thankyou


  13. Bobbi says:

    I agree – the ISRV would be fabtastic. Sometimes you just despair of humanity, or their drunken alter egos anyway. Is there a drunk bus in Edinburgh? I know they’ve got one in London, now all they need is a police-station style ‘drunk tank’ with holding cells to keep the general drunken public in a place of safety till morning and protect ambulance crews from suicide-inducing calls like that! It could be staffed by some A&E nurses (scary people to time wasters – and everyone else!) and a couple of police officers in case thy got rowdy, to restrain and arrest them, and replace them in their cells :) good luck with the drunk calls! X


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